A Post With Lots of Rant and Exaggeration

I LOST MY SMARTPHONE ON THE BUS THIS MORNING
@!*&^%$#@)*_^*+
And when my friend contacted my number around 15 minutes after we got off from the bus, my phone was already turned off.
And Oh. My. Goodness.
I CAN'T BELIEVE I LOST ALL THE MEMOS INSIDE WHICH ARE FAR WORTHIER THAN THE PHONE VALUE ITSELF.
My novel script's revision notes, ideas scribbles, 4 fics i'm about to do.
OGODTHISHURTSSOBAD /FANNINGMASELF
I have this habit to store everything that popped up in my head -especially random ideas- into my smartphone, rather than directly type it on pc -i never save any of my ideas list on pc anyway-. Because it's more effective and easier to do that way.
So....
I'M SO MAD AT MYSELF ACTUALLY FOR LOSING THEM MY PRECIOUS WORKS, AND I JUST HAVE A BACKUP OF ONE FIC MENTIONED ABOVE WHY AM I SO DUMB /FANNINGMASELFAGAIN

Burn in hell Bless your souls, dear thieves.

ps : Pardon me, I'm still in haze

Lost

I'm losing myself.

And somehow, my reason to live for.

Life's no longer providing it's excitement for me.

Day's no longer promising it's unexpected path of journey for me.

I miss school times.

I miss writing in the middle of math or Indonesian class. Scribbling notes in the corner of my text book.

I miss going to school's library, scrutinizing the shelves to pull out a book and the smile i'll plaster on my face as I anticipate the other universe I'm about to enter.

I miss getting back home in the afternoon. Spacing out, trying to catch the inspiration outside that knocks my ride's window.

I miss hanging out after school with my girls.

I miss organizing school's annual event.

I miss Mrs. Sri's punishment.

I'm tired of working my arse out for something i don't like. Forty hours per week.

I'm tired of people judging writing is not a REAL job.

I'm tired that somehow life needs money too much and we're slaving for it.

I'm tired.

Can't i get my life back ?